An eternal memory

At age 3:
I wept and stood by the window and held the grill as tight as I could. I prayed that the grill could loosen up and I could free. That was the first time in my life, I saw my Dad betray me. He never made me cry till then but today though I pleaded him not to leave me; he left me and was standing at the other side of the grill. We both wept for different reasons; I knew mine but never knew his. A new life has started in the name of schooling.

At age 8:
My Dad looked into my eyes with pride. I held my first prize in the stage and the only person whom I could see in the whole crowd was my Dad. There were thousands cheering but those only claps that I heard were that of my father’s. My dad hugged and kissed me and told that he would buy me an ice cream. We both went in his bike and I sat in the front above the petrol tank. I was grumpy and telling my dad to speed up but he never went beyond 40 kmph, this made the whole evening boring.

At age 13:
Everyday I used to play cricket with my friends in the ground that is opposite to my house. Every day before going to school and after coming back from school we used to gather up and split ourselves into two teams and used to play. I could easily say that those days were the most memorable days of the life. My dad always used to stand near the tree and watch me play. He used to get up in the morning before we could gather to play and used to sweep and water the whole ground. He used to do the same in the evenings too. Though it meant a lot of hard work, he did that every single day. I never knew why he used to clean the ground even though it was no way related to our house.

At age 15:
My birthday was fast approaching. For every birthday of mine, dad used to buy me cloths but this time I said that even I would come along with him to buy. That was the first time I was buying cloths for myself. I went inside the shop, it was so huge and there were thousands of dresses; I wondered who the hell on earth would I be able to select one. Dad selected one but I didn’t like it so we bought the one which I liked. I told my dad to buy a new shirt for himself but he said that he would in a different shop.

At age 18:
I extended my mark sheets to the person who was sitting infront of me. He scanned for few seconds and told me that these marks could not fetch me a Computer science Engineering seat in their college. My dad gave him a letter, he read it and said that it’s only because of the recommendation he is offering me a seat, he said me to study hard and we both left tat place. I rode the bike back home, I was excited and rode the bike as fast as I could; dad sat behind and held me hard.


At age 23:
         Every single day, there would be misunderstandings. Every single job that I did didn’t satisfy and which in-turn would be the reason for getting fired. I spend more than a year sitting at home in fear of facing the world again which has already marked me as a failure. My dad on the other hand has had enough of me. He works hard even now and earns bread for family while I find only ways of spending it.

At age 26:
I held her hand and stood in the hall. Everyone were shocked to see me married. I saw my dad and said that she was my future and I couldn’t imagine a life without her. There were many strong words and finally I moved my way out of the house.

At age 30:
I held my mobile and wanted to call him but something stopped me. It has been three years since I spoke with dad and came out of the house. I was held up in traffic and I needed someone to be there with my wife in the hospital. That was the first day I felt alone in my life. In the end, I mustered up courage and called my dad; he quickly responded and rushed to the hospital.

At age 33:
I left my son in his school for the first time. He cried and pleaded me not to leave him alone. I could not see him cry that way but I had to. There was no way I could stand there and watch my son cry. I waved him a good bye and moved away from his sight. Only after becoming a dad, I knew why my dad cried when I first went to school.

At age 40:
I saw some young people who had sports bike over take us. My son held my hand and told me burn some fuel. I told him that we are going fine. He looked at the speedometer and it showed 40kmph. He was disappointed but he didn’t know that it was his same dad who was similarly disappointed when his dad rode the bike in this speed. Dad’s can be disappointing but you never understand them until you become a dad.

At age 45:
Every day my son used to be angry with me that I am not playing with him but I used to tell him that his dad is too tired to play. He used to be angry and say that I should stop doing things that are useless like cleaning the garden twice, cleaning the house whenever any water splits or any pieces flies. I just used to smile because even when I was at his age, I never used to understand why my father used to clean the ground twice a day. I never understood that it was for me that he cleaned the whole ground, so that I could play without getting hurt falling down.

At age 50:
The car that I ordered arrived exactly on his birthday. A gift that I bought to my son as soon as he crossed 18 years and bought his licence. I sat beside my son and watched him riding the new vehicle.  When my son asked me why I was still riding my old bike and didn’t buy a car for myself, I realised why my dad refused to buy clothes for himself where I bought.

At age 53:
I said thanks and moved out of the cabin. I came to my son and said that they have accepted to offer the job. He was happy and hugged me hard. I was happy but the feeling that my father would have had while joining me in college through recommendation slapped me hard now. I hardly could smile.

DAD, a forgotten character in our lives yet he is the person who gave us life. One could understand the value of a person only when there are not around us but the value of a DAD could be understood only when you are a DAD, and the day you understand your DAD, mostly he wouldn't be with us. HE doesn't buy you clothes expecting that you would buy him later; he wouldn't gift you expecting that you would treat him better later; he does everything just because he is DAD.

       The only thing that we could do to him in return is just to remember him in every moment of our life. DAD isn’t just any other relation, DAD is an EMOTION.

******

After writing this , I wanted to talk with my dad and say how much I loved him. I opened his room and went in, he was on call and as soon as he saw me, he kept his mobile aside. I wanted to go near, hug and scream that I loved him but I silently said "Good night" and switched off the lights. Maybe that's enough, he would have understood why I came afterall he is my DAD.